Another Memorial Day weekend come and gone. I hope everyone had a nice long weekend doing whatever it is you do. It always surprises me how many folks don’t know what Memorial Day stands for, just that it’s a long weekend and even better a short work week. Real quickly it is to honor all those that have served, fought and died for our Country in battle. Yes even those 18 year olds that were given the option from judges across the country of time plus probation or enlisting, even they should be recognized. Why not teach a petty criminal how to become a honed in killing machine. In all seriousness I hope everyone was able to thank family members that have served or were able to thank a soldier in passing. I was in the airport all day and while there were plenty of soldiers coming and going, I spent the majority of my lay-over time reminding the TSA agents that they are not the 6th branch of the military. And whenever they are ready to come down from their collective high-horse, we citizens are ready as well. And I wonder why I get “special screening” every time. The airport can be a very entertaining place, the people watching is one of a kind, especially when you post up at a gate with the next flight headed straight for Shanghai. If you want to see the newest and hippest luggage coming on the market, go find a flight heading to the far East and you will see what is going to be on every liberal arts bound college kids Christmas list next year. You will also find the latest in face masks here as well. Maybe it’s mandated by the Chinese government, possibly afraid of Democracy spreading from inbound US flights. If they only knew this flight was coming from Chicago, where they haven’t enjoyed democracy in years!
I knew we were getting close to home when I overheard a phone conversation while waiting to board our regional hop, skip and a jump jet home. The man that called my fellow passenger was upset and felt it couldn’t wait apparently. My fellow passenger allegedly promised this guy a “show pig” for his daughter, my bet it she already is one or at least one of her friends would work, but I digress, and it sounds like the caller didn’t like the end product. The passenger, like any good stock swindler, immediately blamed the mistake on his hired hand. Why not, he can’t speak the language and surely doesn’t have a cell phone so he basically he doesn’t exist, all clear! Plus as the passenger would announce at least 36 times to the whole terminal, “I’VE BEEN IN RENO ALL WEEK!” so he couldn’t be held responsible. I am sure Reno hated to see this “whale” leave town. Word is they are going to be out of french toast at the Best Western Reno for at least another week and all the slot stools are in need of a good tightening. But alas it was good to know that we were getting close to home and that my public education was going to continue to serve me just fine.
We had a great time in Chicago; it was the perfect mix of great weather, great food, great excursions and most importantly great company. So that wasn’t Oprah I kept seeing, it took hours to erase all those pics of me and random black women from the camera. We kept very busy, but never felt rushed, kind of like every quarterback A&M faced last year. We covered a lot from architectural tours, to fine dining, shopping, art places and even a game of putt-putt in the middle of the park with a few Mike’s Hard Lemonades. LOL! (For all the Chris Hansen fans). I mentioned art places, this was more like an art city and art people everywhere, or it could have simply been a Star-trek convention going on, depends on who you ask. Regardless the Art Institute of Chicago was quite a spectacular, it houses some of the most famous and rare pieces out there, in fact if anyone would have gotten a picture of me in there, it would be a one of a kind, never going to happen again type piece that surely would be worth something. By the way any of you with toddler age children, save those papers with all the scribbling on them, apparently there is a place in this super awesome world of art for them as well. Please see exhibit A. So we walk into the “Modern Contemporary” room and after successfully muffling my laughter with fake coughs, I had to get the camera and document this. And in true non-art appreciating fashion I quickly pulled of a picture from the middle of the room of this 20’x20’ behemoth, with the flash on. I was promptly told that this was a no-no, and it proved to cut our viewing session short, by short I mean over, if only I had been privy to this information earlier; I might have had us out of there after the second Renoir! I mean seriously though, what was my Japanese made flash going to do to this acid-trips pencil and crayon loopty loops? All in all it was good to go and watch my darling wife enjoy seeing the rare art. I also enjoyed getting to wear my new bowler hat and whistling the Thomas Crown Affair theme music for two hours. The guards however, didn’t think my empty cans of Copenhagen were funny when I would roll them around the rooms upon my entrance, but I was entitled to entertainment as well wasn’t I?!
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